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Rabbi Yehuda {Leonard} Blank MS, BCC
Vice President of Professional Development and External Affairs
Chair of the Chaplaincy Commission
Rabbinical Alliance of America/Igud HaRabbonim
917-446-2126  rablenblank@gmail.com
July 17, 2025, 21, Tamuz 5785
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PLEASE BE MISPALLEL FOR MY DEAR CHASHUVA MECHUTAN
NASSON BAUMANN FOR A REFUAH SHELEIMA
Nasson ben Raitz
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You’re Beautiful.
Where’s My Hug?
The importance of being sincere.
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“You’re Beautiful.”

From: Inspired by Rabbi Binyomin Pruzansky, Artscroll, Judaica Series, Mesorah Publications Ltd. Also found in the FJJ, Flatbush Jewish Journal, February 3, 2022, Page 85. “The Sefas Emes says that just as we must believe in H even though we aren’t necessarily able to understand His ways, so too must we believe in every Jew, even when his beauty isn’t shining through. We have to know that no matter how a person appears to us, he is important and beloved to H, as it says in Shir HaShirim (1:5): Though I am black with sin, I am beloved.

We live in a generation that suffers from a black of belief. It’s not primarily a lack of belief in h, because most Torah Jews will state that of course they believe in H. Rather it is a lack of belief in ourselves. People don’t realize their self-worth. People don’t think that what they do really matters.

The prescription for this malady is to know in our hearts that H truly loves us and never abandons us no matter how far we may wander. He desires our avodah, no matter what  level it is on. As Chazal (see Midrash Shir HaShirim 5:2) teach us: H says, Open for Me an opening in your heart as small as the point of a needle and I will open it up as wide as a hall.

The Kotzker Rebbe commented that indeed a small opening can help us rise higher and higher, and the gates of siyata d’Shmaya will open for us, but only on one condition. We must make sure that the hole goes all the way through.

We must make sure that the hole goes all the way through. The commitment we make, no matter how small, must be solid, and then everything will open up for us.

A solid commitment can come only from someone who believes that what he does and says has value. If we believe this ourselves, H can help us grow. If we believe this ourselves, H can help us grow. If we help others believe it of themselves, we can set them on the path to growth. H is waiting eagerly for each and every one of us to bring Him the best we have to offer.”

“Where’s My Hug?”

(ibid)
“Rabbi Avi Fishoff related to me that he once brought a young man named Danny to visit the young man’s grandfather a great tzaddik, for a berachah on Erev Rosh Hashanah. This young man had drifted so far from Yiddishkeit that he no longer kept Shabbos or kosher; he did not even fast on Yom Kippur. Somehow, however, Rabbi Fishoff convinced him to go to his grandfather for a berachah.

On the way, Danny mentioned that he was seldom hugged as a small child. “How come no one eve showed me that they loved me?” he asked. Rabbi Fishoff was startled by the words of  this tall, muscular young man; underneath it all, there was a small child who just wanted to feel loved. When they arrived at the tzaddik’s home, Rabbi Fishoff  excused himself, leaving Danny with his grandfather. He got into his car and called the house, where the tzaddik’s wife picked up the phone. “Please,” he said, “tell your husband to give your grandson a hug. It’s very important.”

Then he called Danny’s mother and asked her if the parents expressed their love for their children with hugs. “Not really,” she replied. “Were just not that type.”

After a short conversation with the mother, Rabbi Fishoff went back into the house. The conversation between Danny and his grandfather had apparently ended and they were walking together toward the door. As they neared the door, the elderly tzaddik raised his right hand to reach for his tall grandson’s shoulder. Danny wasn’t sure exactly what his grandfather was doing, but he stooped down a little to make his shoulder more accessible. At that moment, his grandfather gave him a hug and a kiss, and told him how much he loves him.

When Danny got back into the car with Rabbi Fishoff, he was in such a daze. “I can’t believe it,” he said softly. “I can’t believe he hugged me.”

For the rest of the trip, Danny kept reminding himself of the miraculous event he had just experienced. “This year, I’m going to shul for Rosh Hashanah,” he told Rabbi Fishoff. “I think I’m going to fast on Yom Kippur, too.” He kept to his word. His grandfather’s love had penetrated to his heart and opened it wide.

When we feel loved, we want to show love in return. That is why recognizing H’s love is so powerful a way to inspire our devotion to Him.” 

I have discussed in previous articles the different types of love. The love here between a grandson and his grandfather was one type of love. The love we have for H is another type of love and the love H Yisbarach has for us is another type of love. There are many other types of love. The most important one is to have a love that is sincere. There is another component of love and that is to have trust. In a marriage there is one type of trust, in a friendship there is another type of trust. Between a chaplain, a rabbi or a rebbetzin there is another trust a person who he/she is ministering to. To be trusted is very sacred. We pray to be able to reach and gain a valued and highly respected position of being trusted so that we are able to bring about a meaningful relationship.

Sincerely, Rabbi Yehuda Blank