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Rabbi Yehuda (Leonard) Blank MS, BCC
Vice President of Professional Development and External Affairs
Rabbinical Alliance of America/Igud HaRabbonim
917-446-2126 rablenblank@gmail.com
=Thursday November 23, 2023, Kislev 10, 5784=
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Mi Kiamcha Yisrael
Fargin A Yid
Simchas Hachaim
Agudath’s Yahalom NY Partners with Chesed Mobility
to Enable Homebound family to leave home and do things together
as a family.
(For the entire story and pictures, click on the link at the bottom of this article).
Benching Gomel
Possible Reasons That Prevented A Danerous Holdup
On Shabbos With A Knife
Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving Day.
Simchas Hachaim. Happiness in one’s life. Giving thanks to H.
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Happiness, joy, true simchas hachaim with tremendous gratitude to Hakadosh Baruch Hu and to those who help bring happiness to others such as the Blank family in Brooklyn. How important it is to fargin a Yid for his/her/their happiness. “Rav Meilich Biderman shlita has stated that FARGINING A YID is the secret to success, as signified by the letters Pei, Aleph, Yud- Poseiach Es Yadecha representing H’s bracha of parnassah and more.” “Chazal teach us the importance of Veahavta lereiacha kamocha which includes feeling genuine pleasure in someone else’s simchas and success. The nachas of acheinu Benei Yisrael should bring gladness to our hearts and minds. At all times we must make the decision to Fargin A Yid. By doing this we will be uniting Klal Yisrael. Fargin A Yid – Genuine Happiness For Others. Join The Movement. Sponsored anonomously L’Tovas HaKlal.” (This was a two page ad as seen in several leading Jewish Anglo newspapers). If a person knows someone very well who is making a chasunah for a child or already made one and was surprised having not been invited, how wonderful it would be to still wish a heartzika mazel tov. It would even be more of a simchadik and sincere mazel tov if one can remove any feelings of hurt or disappointment about not having been invited and even be able to judge them kaf zchus. Here is another example of Fargining not just a Yid, but an entire family who received a precious gift of a van. No gimmicks, not a raffle prize, but from a world reknown organization whose Mi Kiamcha Yisrael has brought immense simchas hachaim never thought possible. The Blank family profitted through the remarkable care and interest for those with special needs by Agudath Israel’s Yahalom New York division.
(Quoted from Agudath Israel) “The Blank family of Brooklyn, New York has four young children, two of whom have a severe disability. Neither of the children who are medically fragile can walk, eat, or breathe on their own. It is impossible for the Blanks to leave home as a family – on vacation, to attend a simchah, or even to go to the ice cream store.
The Blanks are members of Yahalom NY, Agudath Israel’s division that provides resources and support for New York families of children with special needs. Yahalom previously connected the Blanks with resources that enabled them to get two full-time nurses to help care for their children with disabilities, at a time when there was a nursing shortage.” This family is my son Aryeh, daughter-in-law Tzivia, Moshe, Tzvi Dov, Chaya Rivka and Tehila Rachel. Despite any challenges they might have, they are truly very happy and grateful to H shepping nachas from all their children, each in a wonderful, caring, loving way. For the full story and family pictures, please click on the link at the bottom of this article. They are truly role models and we should all fargin them with all of our hearts. Agudath Israel deserves much praise for caring about all of the families they seek to give the best possible help in many ways. We can all learn from Aryeh and Tzivia. I am immensely proud of them as are Tzivia’s parents Rabbi Yisrael and Mrs. Lifsha Kleinman. (If you or someone you know would like advice from Aryeh and Tzivia, send your request to aryehb4@gmail.com).
Here is the story about the Shabbos dangerous holdup with a knife and it is about me. It happened some years ago about this time of the year before the various holidays. I was walking to shul on East Broadway one Friday when the days are short. It was very misty and there were no street lights in that area. All of a sudden a man passed me by and pushed me against a fence. He was wearing a hood and he had a slight accent. He opened his coat to reveal a knife which he was pressing against me. For some reason I tried to push his hand back and felt the top side of the cold long knife he was holding. I said to him, it is Shabbos and I don’t have anything. He responded saying ok and then quickly walked away. After davening at the shul, I went to see Rav Dovid Feinstein zt”l and told him what happened. He said I should bench Gomel. Of course I attribute everything to the Ribono shel Olam, but why when I said to that stranger it is Shabbos and I don’t have anything that made him say ok and he left me B H? Was it possible that this person had worked for or knows someone who does not handle money or carry outdoors on Shabbos? Even more so, this person might know someone who is Shabbos observant and is kind and had made a positive impression on the robber. We can never know the impact and the positive impression that we might make.
One of the main comments made by many news reporters about the March For Israel was how calm and respectful the multitudes of people were with no violence, no words of hatred and no arrests.
In my neighborhood I and others have been approached by people some who are total strangers wishing us well, wanting us to know how supportive they are about Israel, wanting to know if we have relatives living in Israel and how are they doing. Flyers that have been posted of those kidnapped have not been torn down. Though we are all reminded of the state of affairs with police stationed at synagogues and local schools we are mispallel to H Yisbarach for His protection throughout the world.
Thanksgiving: I have been asked many times by individuals I have worked with through the years if I celebrate Thanksgiving Day. The response I often have given is that I am always grateful to the Holy One, our G for many reasons and give thanks daily throughout the year. I have mentioned that it is wonderful for many people to give thanks to G at least one day a year and to give blessings to Him for all that He does for us. It is interesting that years ago there were TV shows about families and when it came time for dinner , the father would lead the family in a blessing thanking G for the food they are about to partaken.
Where my wife a”h used to work, the women would discuss all of their shopping and preparations for Thanksgiving Day and for their various holidays. When they asked my wife what about her preparations, she shared what she would prepare each week for the Shabbos and for the various Jewish holidays. They were flabbergasted, or I should say they were blown away hearing about the menu she would prepare every week or for the holidays. Each meal was what one would call a full course meal. They couldn’t get over that she was not bored doing the shopping often with her husband for such special meals week after week or for the holidays and that included beautiful flowers to complement the Shabbos table. Though they had their own recipes, they still sought some of hers and advice on preparing meals in advance. What also amazed them was how calm my wife was taking everything in stride. After she was nifteres I would often be asked so who does the cooking now. Well unless I want to buy some ready made items, I do my own food preparations and not just cooking eggs. Once in a while I’m invited out or go to the family for some of the Yom Tovim. Hmm lets see, I make different kinds of chicken, fish, such as gefilte, tuna steak, Bronzini, Flounder, quiche, and well, I can’t write everything I make in this article. OK, I’m not trying to show off, but life does go on. I also buy flowers to complement the Shabbos table.
I had a Jewish neighbor whose family was not able to get together for the Yom Tovim and were all off from work on Thanksgiving Day. So, they would get together at their mother’s apartment to have a delicious meal that she prepared. They would then take any leftovers to have and enjoy on Shabbos. Even in her later year she would make every effort to attend shul on Shabbos until it was too difficult. She then joined my family for the Shabbos meals. Though I too live alone, I often think of her and how much joy she brought my family. She was a wonderful role model as a mother and a bubby to her own family and was also like a bubby for my children too.
There is a beautiful story in Zera Shimshon by Rabbi Nachman Seltzer Volume 1 Published by Shaar Press Distributed by Mesorah Publications Ltd. Pages 99-112. I would like to share parts with you from Parshas Toldos . This amazing story is related to happiness about a father who cared for his son, and a family that came to thank H in a truly authentic way for all the wonderful things that He does for them each and every day. It’s a story of emunah and belief, and about the recognition we must have of the Source of everything. The author met a man on a flight to Toronto who shared this with him. “There is an organization in the city where he lives that helps people with an unusual type of chesed providing rides to many hospitals for people who come from all over the world for many different reasons and are usually without transportation. Mi kiamcha Yisrael. Mr. Menashe Rabinowitz (not his real name) loves to make conversation with the passengers he volunteers driving to and from various hospitals. One of his passengers seemed to be mumbling with his lips. Reb Rabinowitz thought the passenger was davening. The passenger responded “I’ve been visiting the hospital for a while now, and it hasn’t become easier with time.” “Who do you have there?” “A parent.” The driver nodded. “That is very difficult.” “Very difficult” the passenger responded. Anyway, in the beginning I was having trouble dealing with my situation, Every time I’d visit the hospital, I felt more depressed.” “So what did you do?” “I gave the matter lots of thought until I decided that, instead of allowing myself to become more and more depressed by the sight of someone I love suffering, I would turn things around.” “How so?” asked the driver.
“Instead of focusing on the patient in the hospital-which on the surface is a terrible thing-I began thanking H for all the positive things in my life.” “And that helped you out of your depression?” “Yes,
replied the passenger simply. “I’ve come to realize that I have so many incredible things for which to thank H. He does so much for me and my family. It is true that right now I’m in pain every time I visit the hospital, but I have nachas from my children and enjoy good health… So yes, this practice of mine has really helped me change my perspective, and the overwhelming sadness has all but disappeared.”
The passenger wanted to know why the driver was so interested in what he was hearing. Mr Rabinowitz shared that one of his children had gone off the derech. He has tried so many things for his son to return home, but nothing has helped. Even though he has much nachas from all his other children when he thinks of this son, it makes him very sad. “It’s not that Reb Menashe hadn’t heard of similar ideas in the past, but hearing was one thing and actually seeing it working for someone else was another thing. Here was a man who was watching a parent suffering in the hospital and had found a way to combat the sadness. Might it not work for him as well?
When Mr. Rabinowitz arrived home that evening he decided to take the whole matter one step forward, and when all the children were gathered around the dinner table- all the children besides Yanky, who was never around anymore-he told them what had happened that afternoon and how he was determined to begin thanking H for all the good things in their lives, instead of focusing on the negative. In truth, sharing this idea with his wife and children made lots of sense, because he wasn’t the only one suffering, they all were, and he hoped that this new idea would succeed in infusing all of them with hope and happiness.”
Remembering the last time they saw Yanky, his anger and his change of style of clothing brought them unhappiness. “And so it went, with the entire family involved in the new project, There was a newfound optimism in the house now and the walls themselves seemed to be a lighter color than the heavy gray they had seen before.” Some short weeks later Pesach was coming with no changes in Yanky Rabinowitz. Their feelings were not great not having Yanky around, being part of the family’s Pesach preparations and maybe not joining them for the Pesach Sederim. “And yet, with the advent of the new “Thank You, H” campaign they were waging, life seemed so much better and brighter. As the first Seder was to begin, “The mood was upbeat and filled with gaiety, as Reb Menashe and his rebbetzin smiled at all the kinderlach sitting in their seats and waiting for the Seder to begin. Suddenly they heard the front door open. “Maybe it’s Eliyahu HaNavi,” called out one of the younger kids, but his suggestion didn’t receive the attention it would have garnered, since the door opening could only mean one thing, Yanky was in the house. But he didn’t appear in the dining room, and it didn’t seem as if he intended to join them in celebrating his ancestors exit from the land of Egypt thousands of years earlier. Reb Menashe shrugged his shoulders. “Nu, why don’t we begin”,” he called out, and the Seder started. The opening act passed relatively quickly, as everyone made Kiddush and the four questions were asked. But as the evening wore on and they reached Maggid, the family found its stride. It was a different Maggid this year. Their father’s words about thanking H for all His kindnesses seemed to have struck a chord that reverberated within the heart of every one of them, because though they had been following Reb Menashe’s lead for the past two weeks, Seder night seemed to bring out a whole new depth. Instead of focusing on the miracles that the Ribono shel Olam did for them on a daily basis, they focused on the miracles He had wrought for His nation on a collective level for so many thousands of years. Everyone had something to add, everyone had something to say. The conversation was alive and fluid, with the children chiming in with a story, an idea, something their rebbi or morah had taught them. They were thanking H, but it was much broader than it had been, which made sense, considering that it was Pesach after all. And surprisingly enough Yanky walked in and out of the dining room a few times. Was he searching for something? Had he heard a concept that interested him? No one dared ask to what they owed the honor of his presence, as interested as they might be. And so the Seder passed, in an array of delectable food for the body and mouthwatering sustenance for the neshamah. And although Yanky hadn’t remained in the dining room for too long a time, he seemed to be having a very difficult time staying away, because he kept on coming back for more. What did it mean? No one knew.”
At the second Seder Yanky decided to join the family. “Though still not dressed like the rest of the kids, there was something different about their brother and son. No one could put their finger on the change, but the difference in his demeanor was undeniable.” Yanky had remained for the entire second Seder. “The next night, Yanky made his move.”Tatty,” he said to his father, “would you mind if I came with you to shul tonight?” “Mind?” asked Reb Menashe. “Are you kidding” I would love for you to come with me to shul!” “Even if I’m not dressed like everyone else?” “One hundred percent. I would be honored to have you along with me.” And Yanky came.
It was the end of Yom Tov when Yanky finally told them what happened to him.
“All my life,” he began,” I’ve been searching for happiness. I never found it, Even though our house was a happy place, it wasn’t the genuine happiness of Torah that I’d been hearing about all my life. It seemed that the happiness that I found in our home wasn’t so much about being religious. People seemed to be keeping the mitzvos because that was what they had to do, without that joy, light, serenity, or authentic desire my rebbeim had been going on and on about for as long as I could recall. Being frum was not making me a happy person. For years I wondered about this, and eventually I came to the conclusion that real happiness was to be found in the outside world, among the non-frum and the non-Jews. So I left: my goal being to find happiness. Real happiness.
“Yet as much as I searched and looked, I couldn’t find that happiness. Now I was truly disappointed. No happiness inside and no happiness outside! Was nobody honestly happy anymore?
If no one is happy, I said to myself, there’s really no reason to be frum again. I might as well just remain as I am.
“And then I came home on Seder night and I realized that I was wrong.”
“Passing by the dining room I heard the voices of my brothers and sisters and they were discussing the greatness of H and the kindness that He does for us each and every day. Every single one of them had something to add to the conversation. And as they spoke I realized something. They sounded happy. Honestly happy. For the first time, it sounded as though my family had discovered true happiness in their lives and in their connection with H. As much as I didn’t want to, I found myself passing through the dining room again and again. I kept waiting for the whole thing to blow over, but if anything, it became stronger.
“That was why I decided to come for the entire second Seder. I needed to see if the first Seder had been a one time wonder, or if there was more to come. And there was. The second Seder turned out to be even better than the first! This was happiness and this was what I had been searching for my entire life-and here I had finally found it in my own house! And that is why I came with you to shul, Tatty. Because I have decided to give everything another chance. To see if the happiness that I found here over Yom Tov can be part of my life.”
Despite the challenges we all face at different times in our lives, with our emunah and betachon in H, we can find much happiness. We have to have hope and not give up. We don’t have to travel far from our homes to find that happiness. As Rabbis, Rebbitzens and Chaplains we can inspire, we could encourage, we can listen and we could be that support a person might need in his or her times of need. We can be the one who can help a person find much good in their life and even find that hidden happiness. Often we do not have the answers to why, but we often can help discover the hidden treasures in everyone. We are not alone. We are together. There is much achdus in Klal Yisrael. H loves Klal Yisrael and we love H with all of our hearts and souls. Our Torah, our tefilos, our Tehillim gives us tremendous strength and the resolve to follow in His ways helping us to bring Mashiach even sooner.
From The Gentle Weapon Prayers for
Everyday and Not So Everyday Moments
Timeless Wisdom from the Teachings of the Hasidic Master
Rebbe Nachman of Breslov
IN G’S WILL
G, I want
to be so many things,
to do so much,
to achieve so endlessly-
but can anyone
be everything,
do everything,
have everything?
You alone understand
the fragile balance of my soul.
You’ve invested in me
the potential
to make of that balance
a perfect creation.
Now help me fashion myself
Into just such a creation,
“in accordance with Your Will.”
Sincerely, Rabbi Yehuda Blank