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Rabbi Yehuda {Leonard} Blank MS, BC
Vice President of Professional Development and External Affairs
Chair of the Chaplaincy Commission
Rabbinical Alliance of America/Igud HaRabbonim
917-446-2126 rablenblank@gmail.com
**July 30, 2026, 16 Av, 5786**
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No two people are alike. Everyone, even those who have similar spiritual, physical, medical or emotional symptoms, must be treated accordingly by addressing each person as individuals. When addressing the needs of individuals, we should not think of the “one size fits all”. The chizuk, advice, or even the style of listening should never be the same for everyone. Chaplains and rabbis minister to many with similar concerns and challenges in their lives. The approach to offer care should be geared towards the needs of each individual.  Our approach should always be based on what is appropriate for each visit. Most important is to be sincere in our words and our actions. It is not only what we say but how we say it. I remember one of the important things to be aware of as chaplains is to be sincere, to show and give kindness by listening, being attentive and caring about the other person with one’s heart.  We too want to walk in the ways of H and pray to be good role models and good ambassadors of H and Klal Yisrael 

From: The Torah Any Times, from TorahAnyTime.com a publication of TorahAnytime. Parshat Ve’etchanan, 11 Av, 5786/July 25, 2026. By Rabbi Avraham M. Mendelson, A Man of Spirit. “One of the central themes of this period is our relationship with other people, or bein adam l”chaveiro.

As Moshe Rabbeinu nears the end of his life, he turns to H with one final request. Klal Yisrael will soon need a new leader, someone to guide the nation after his passing. To that end, Moshe davens: “Yifkod H Elokei haruchos l”chol basar…May H, the G of the spirits of all flesh, appoint a leader over the congregation” (Bamidbar 27:16). Rashi explains that the phrase “Elokei haruchos” refers to someone who understands that every person has a unique temperament, unique strengths, unique struggles, and therefore each must be approached differently. There is no “one – size – fits – all” approach to people.

H responds a few Pesukim later, stating, “Take Yehoshua ben Nun, a man in whom there is spirit” (ibid. v. 18). On this, Rashi comments., “As you requested.” Yehoshua possessed precisely the quality Moshe had asked for, namely the ability to understand each individual and respond accordingly to that person’s particular needs.

Of course, Chazal teach that Yehoshua also earned the leadership because he never left Moshe Rabbeinu’s side (Bamidbar Rabbah 21:14; Terumah 16a). But, comments Rav Chai, Shmulevitz, the straightforward reading of the Pesukim emphasizes something else, notably this extraordinary quality of understanding in the realm of bein adam l”chaveiro.

The Ramban (Bamidmar 13:4) moreover notes that Yehoshua appears fifth in the list of meraglim, a list arranged according to greatness. If so, there were individuals greater than him in wisdom. Yet Yehoshua became the leader because he knew how to deal with people. He knew that every Jew require something different.

In New York’s Lower East Side sometime during the 1950’s, a woman entered an appliance store and placed a deposit on an item she wished to purchase. The following day she returned. “I’ve changed my mind, “she said. “May I please have my deposit back?” The owner graciously refunded her money. The next day she returned once again. “I’d like my deposit back. “The owner was confused. “I already returned it to you yesterday. “No, you didn’t,” she insisted. An argument followed during which the woman became increasingly emotional and eventually broke down crying.

The dispute was brought before Rav Moshe, and both the store owner and woman presented their claims as Rav Moshe listened patiently. Then, suddenly, the woman reached into her purse, removed two pills, and declared, “If you don’t tell him to return my money, I’ll swallow these pills and end my life.” Without the slightest hesitation, Rav Moshe stood up, walked into the kitchen, returned with a glass of water, placed it before her and calmly said, “Please, go ahead.” 

The woman immediately turned pale. She put the pills away, rushed out of the apartment, and the matter was over. Rav Moshe understood exactly who he was dealing with. For that individual, that was the correct response.

There is a second story which contains an equally important lesson. Towards the end of Rav Moshe’s life, he was admitted to the hospital shortly before Shabbos. A few hours before candle lighting, the telephone rang, and his son, Rav Dovid, answered.

A woman was calling. “May I speak to Rabbi Feinstein? I have an important question.” Rav Dovid gently explained that his father had just been hospitalized and asked whether the question could wait until Shabbos. “No,” she replied. “It really can’t.” Thinking it might involve a serious halachic matter, Rabbi Dovid offered, “Perhaps you can tell me the question, and I’ll ask my father.” The woman asked, “Could you please ask Rabbi Feinstein what time candle lighting this week?” Rav Dovid was stunned. Then she quietly explained. 

“My husband passed away seven months ago, and ever since then, every Erev Shabbos, I’ve called Rabbi Feinstein to ask what time to light candles.” Rav Moshe never told her to buy a calendar and never suggested looking it up herself. He understood that the question was never really about candle-lighting. It was about giving comfort to someone who needed to hear a familiar, caring voice before every Shabbos. That was what she needed. And Rabbi Moshe responded to her needs and not merely to her question. That is the hallmark of true leadership.”

From: 77 Mitzvos for Today, based on the Chafetz Chaim’s Sefer HaMitzvos HaKatzar. Published by Targum Press, Inc.

Distributed by Feldheim Publishers, Copyright Moshe Goldberger 718 948 2548. Emulating H’s Ways. Walk in His Ways. Pages 19-18. “We have to follow H’s ways of kindness, mercy, compassion, and so on, as much as possible. For example, we are taught, “Be holy, for H is holy” (Vayikra 19:2). Rav Avigdor Millwe, zt”l, explains that because H is holy beyond anything that we can comprehend, the Jewish nation has always been the most holy nation. We become holy when 1) we fulfill the laws of the Torah, and 2) we study H’s ways and endeavor to model our thoughts, attitudes, and behavior after H.

Some examples of following H’s ways are: 

  • To be kind to others, even when they are not appreciative of our efforts, as H is always kind to us, although we don’t always acknowledge Him and His kindness.
  • Forgive others when they apologize, as H forgives us when we repent.
  • Be more patient, as H is extremely patient with us.
  • Be humble, as H is. “Wherever we find His greatness, we also find His humility” (Megillah 30b). The Talmud teaches, “A person should always be soft and flexible as a reed, not firm as a ceder tree” (Taanis 20b).
  • Be modest and hidden, like H, who conceals Himself.

(For more on this topic, please see our book Emulating Our Creator [Targum/Feldheim, 2005].

May we all be zoche to walk in the ways of H and bring kindness to this world. 

Sincerely, Rabbi Yehuda ( Leonard) Blank