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Rabbi Yehuda {Leonard} Blank MS, BCC
Vice President of Professional Development and External Affairs
Chair of the Chaplaincy Commission
Rabbinical Alliance of America/Igud HaRabbonim
917-446-2126 rablenblank@gmail.com
= September 4th , 2025, 11 Elul 5785 =
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From The Mystery and the Majesty
Elul * Yamim Noraim * Succos
The grandeur and nobility of the Days of Awe and joy.
By: Rabbi Daniel Glatstein, Published by Artscroll, Mesorah Publications Ltd. Pages 61- 62 “How can we be commanded to love ?” “Rabbi Akiva Eiger presents a beautiful idea: H commands us to love Him, but how can we be instructed to love someone or something? If one has as dislike for another person, for example, he cannot learn to love that person by merely being commanded to do so. So how can H expect us to love Him simply because we are told we must? The answer is that there is a rule in relationships: Kamayim hapanim lapanim kein leiv ha adam la adam, As water reflets a face back to a face, so one’s heart is reflected back to him by another (Mishlei 27:19); i.e., if someone loves you, then you will love him back. Love is reciprocated. The Shema that we recite daily states, veahavta es H”, you shall love H. However, immediately preceding the Shema is the phrase, haboceir beamo Yisrael be ahava ! H has selected us with love! Once we reorganize that H loves us, then we can readily be instructed to love H, since love is reciprocal.
“Ahavas H: A daily fulfillment” “The Chofetz Chaim writes that although ahavas H is one of the few mitzvos whose actual fulfillment is, for some reason, often neglected. Indeed, the Chofetz Chaim recommends that we should be careful not to eat in the morning until we are certain we have fulfilled this mitzvah. We should bear this thought in mind when we say the pasuk V’ahavta es H Elokecha, as noted before above, or at least contemplate our love for H before leaving the shul in the morning to return home.
In Sefer Ahavas Chesed, the Chafetz Chaim notes that ahavas H is not a very lofty madreigah. He points out that there is a difference between ahavah and deveikus. The Torah tells us, uvo sidbak, and to Him shall you cleave (Devarim 10:20); deveikus, cleaving to H, means that the feeling of ahavah is constantly in one’s heart. It is always present. Ahavas H, on the other hand, may be present only on occasion, when a person is motivated and stirred to love H. The madreigah of ahavas H is reached even if it is not on one’s mind at all times.
Rav Avigdor Miller would say that a person should not let a single day pass by without articulating, at least once, “I love You H.” Although the Rambam describes ahavas H as a very exalted ,adreigah, nevertheless, the Gra felt that ahavas H can be taught even to young children. Perhaps the highest levels of ahavas H can be achieved only by noteworthy tzaddikim, but there are more basic levels of ahavas H, that as an impetus for teshuvah mei’ ahavah that can then catapult us to garner zechusim that surpass the zecuchim of tzaddikim gemurim.”
From: Guidance from Noted Baal Mussar and Torah Psychologist
Rav Shlomo Hoffman zt”l . Informal Chizuk Discussions with Rav Hoffman
“The need to feel loved and appreciated”
Transcribed by Rav Meir Simcha Stein with Avrohom Birnbaum.
Yated Ne’eman, August 29, 2025 Page 30 “ Some people are extremely sensitive to what other people think of them, while others hardly care at all. Where do these personality traits come from? What drives some people to depend on popular opinion, but drives other to ignore it? How can we deal with the problems that might arise from these traits?
Over the few weeks, we will highlight a collection of insights shared by Rav Hoffman over the years. It is presented here as a natural continuation of the previous discussions which dealt with “conditional love,” and the fear from which many people suffer that “Maybe they don’t really love me.”
HUMAN NATURE
The need to feel appreciated is a normal part of human nature. On a subconscious level, our dependence on the good opinion of others is far more important than we might imagine. A person can fall into depression because he feels unappreciated by those around him. For this reason, the Rambam writes that the mitzva to “love your neighbor as yourself” entails, appreciating the other person and praising him.
The Rambam (Hilchos Dei’6:2), writes that the mitzvah to love each and every member of Klal Yisrael as oneself, as is written, “You shall love your fellow as yourself” (Vayikra 19:18). Therefore, one must speak the other person’s praise and be protective of his property just as one is protective of one’s own property and desires honor for himself. One who gains honor at the expense of his fellow’s disgrace has no share in Olam Habaah.
If you tell someone, “What nice glasses you bought!”, you are complimenting his good taste. Through this, or any other compliment, you fulfill a mitzvah from the Torah of “ love your fellow Jew.”
Here, Rambam reveals to us a deep insight into the meaning of love- it goes hand in hand with admiration. When you admire someone, you love them. And when you compliment them, expressing your admiration in words, you bring your love to a practical level.
The Rambam also teaches us something important about what it means to feel loved. A person has a real need to feel appreciated by others. A sincere compliment means a lot to people. The Torah therefore commands us “love your neighbor as yourself.” Compliment him. Make him feel loved and appreciated. By doing so, you encourage him to invest the effort necessary to succeed.”
It is of utmost importance to always be sincere whether to a spouse, a relative, or a friend. It is also important to always be sincere when making a Kiddush H.
A delivery person brought me an item one evening.This man was told beforehand just to deliver the package. I thanked him, conveyed my appreciation and also gave him a tip. He was so enthralled with what he felt was my kindness that he kept giving me all kinds of blessings- not just many thanks but actual blessings.
One day when I was walking in my neigborhood, I saw a woman who was holding on to the arm of what appeared to be her mother and she was limping and in pain. I went over to her and asked if she was ok. At first she started to speak to me in Spanish and then changed to English, thanking me for being concerned about her and for my kind words. I also wished her well and hoped she will be feeling better. I did not know her or her mother and she did not know me. Yet the kind words out of the clear blue sky that I shared with her not only made her and her mother smile but she was so pleased with my interaction with her which she translated and shared with her mother. She could not stop thanking me and for taking some of her pain away.
There is an elderly woman who lives in the Lower East Side and during the summer months tends to the small area around some of the local trees. She plants seeds, waters the flowers surrounding each tree. She really tends to them working hard. One day I stopped right next to this woman as she was tending the plants that were growing so nicely. I complimented her and thanked her for making the neighborhood so beautiful. I told her how much I admired what she has been doing. Her response was positive. She was so pleased that someone took the time to stop and admire her work. She told me how good I made her feel.
We just have to stop and take the time to offer our care to each other. During these days in Elul, there are so many things we can and should do to uplift the spirits of others and to be sincere in whatever we do. Nothing happens in a vacuum. Chaplains, Rabboni and Rebbetzins know the combination to help unlock the difficulties and the challenges many have. Rabbis, Chaplains and Rebbetzins do not have all the answers in life, but can offer inspiration when the opportunity arises. May all of Klal Yisrael be zoche to help bring much simchas hachaim in to our lives and the lives of others.
Respectfully, Rabbi Yehuda Blank